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Sexual Fantasies |
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Understanding Sexual Fantasies
Our attitude toward sex is often influenced by messages we received growing up. We are influenced by how adults expressed affection, the sexual behavior of adults around us, the early messages we received about sex (verbal and non-verbal) and the position of our religion and attitude of our culture toward sex .
Approach to sexuality differs
Our approach to sexuality differs. Our sexual orientation varies just as what turns us on and turns us off. Our level of desire also varies: Some people are easily aroused and would like to have sex more; others less. People also attribute different meanings to sexual thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, and what we consider "normal" varies significantly.
Sexual Fantasy
Indulging in a sexual fantasy enables us to explore things internally that we may decide not to act upon. A sexual fantasy serves as a purpose of exploration; helps us escape from the frustrations of daily life; can enhance an intimate relationship; and enable us to rehearse situations, and so can boost our self-confidence.
Sexual fantasies may conflict with established values, seem outlandish or exaggerated when viewed rationally. Generally speaking, sexual fantasies function to decrease anxiety about sex and increase sexual interest and arousal.
Male and Female Sexual Fantasies
Actually, men's and women's fantasies are more
alike than different. Both sexes fantasize most often, for
instance, about being intimate with their current partner.
Men's fantasies are more visual and get to the sex acts
more quickly. Women's involve more foreplay and more tactile
stimulation. Women's fantasies tend to focus in on the relationship
dynamics between characters, while men's are more often
about impersonal sexual escapades.
Men's sexual fantasies:
- Having sex with an existing partner
- Giving and receiving oral sex
- Having sex with more than one person
- Being dominant
- Being passive and submissive
- Reliving a previous experience
- Watching others make love
- Trying new sexual positions
Women's sexual fantasies:
- The rape fantasy is probably the most popular, with a woman being taken forcefully.
- Having sex with two men at the same time is a delicious fantasy.
- Women often fantasize about being hookers, or strippers who drive their customers wild with passion.
- Another popular fantasy is to be watched by their man while they are having sex with another woman.
- Women often fantasize about being sexually ravaged by their master.
- Women feel sexier if they have an audience while engaging in sexual acts.
- Complete domination over their lover is what women often fantasize about.
- Group sex is a very popular fantasy with women.
- Many women fantasize about having uninhibited sex with a stranger and behaving like a sexual predator.
Be cautious about sharing fantasies
Fantasies are extremely personal. There are risks involved in disclosing them, especially to someone you care for. Sharing fantasies can be liberating, but it's risky. Talk to your partner first about the general theme, then approach with caution. Consider how you'll manage if they don't like your fantasy or if you try acting it out and it just doesn't work.
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The health information contained herein is provided for educational purposes only and is not intended to replace discussions with a healthcare provider. Decisions regarding patient care must be made with a healthcare provider, considering the unique characteristics of the patient.
